Editor's Note: This is the fourth in a series of feature stories on the men who make up the Erie Fantasy Football League. In order to be featured, you must respond to the official Erie League survey.

Psychedelic B's owner Bryan Vince, a charter member of the All-American Conference, never expected to jump to the other division. However, because of a scheduling conflict that prevented both he and his wife Tammy from attending the August auction date, Vince found a move to the Browns Conference to be his only option. 

Although he's having the time of his life by renewing old rivalries with the King Salmons and Donikers, he's still miffed about the move costing him at chance at quarterback Jeff Garcia for one unit. Instead, Joe Nunney - the same GM who stood in for Vince back in '99 and built the highest scoring team in league history - walked away with his spot in the conference and his chance at a bargain QB. Vince looks at the decision as another example of being screwed by league commissioner Kirk Pavelich.

"For the first time, and I can't believe I'm admitting this, I agree with Barth," Vince said. "Every time we have to hand Pav a check for the league entry fee, we should be given a complimentary vat of Vaseline."

Vince, who sports a career record of 50-43 and was the 1996 Erie League Champion, said his greatest moment in the league is happening right now, as he dishes out the smack each week.

"I am in a freaken zone!!" Vince said. "It's hard to keep it going sometimes though, especially when I have no equal. It's kind of like Michael Jordan and the way he motivates himself. I just have to remember how much I enjoy pissing everyone off."

In an effort to facilitate this goal, Vince wanted to take the opportunity to provide a comment for each of the fellow owners in the league.

Jody Barth - Blockheads/Will Van Bibber - Lardass: I can't believe he and Barth are feuding. I'd figure Barth would like the team name."

Dave Bell - Bonecrushers: "If he only could have protected Jim Brown."

John Blust - Dirty Pigs: "Who's in charge of bringing him a step-stool? Also, check his ID."

Jim Damicone - King Salmons: "He's only a QB, 2 RB's, and 3 WR's away from getting to the bowl."

J.P. Dougherty/Brett Harney - Titlebound Two: " Dual ownership?? C'mon, what is the toughest decision they have to make, "Whose turn it is to be the Woman?"

Jason Gillespie - Gibby's: "Isn't he the league's first Albino owner??"

Don Jones - LTP: "It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood, a beautiful day in the neighborhood, won't you be my neighbor? I'm gonna be sick."

Scott Keithley - Rat Bastards: "Bubba Franks for 27 units?? "

Keith Kuratko - Atomic Punks: "Never has a man done so much with such a small penis." (Editor's note: Not really sure how Vince would know this...)

Mike Kuratko -Hostile Omish: "Everyone has to have a personal bitch. The Omish are mine." (Vince leads the all-time series 6-1).

Paul Labonte - Shadow Bandits: "Ruff, ruff, wuff, wuff" translation "You Suck!"

Bill Long - Longshots: "Fantasy Camp???? You better get away from those old dudes, before you know it you'll be eating at the $1.00 buffet and fast walking around the mall." (Long reportedly attended Fantasy Football Camp with Dave Bell, 59, and Sam Profio, 51.)

Joe Nunney - Black Diamond: "I picked up Warner. I put the line-up together. IT'S MY AWARD!!" (Vince is referring to the 1999 season in which fellow owners awarded Nunney - the man who drafted the Psychedelic B's - as the GM of the Year).

Kirk Pavelich - Midnight Vigilantes: "Jason Ehas called. He wants his haircut back."

Sam Profio - Donikers-DTL: "Doomed To Lose-- Our league's version of the Seattle Mariners." (Despite a 64-33 career record and five division championships, Profio has never won a league title).

Jamie Roush - Stonehenge: "Who?? "

Brad Rzyczycki - Cosmic Monsters: "Bridesmaids need love too." (Rzyczycki's Cosmic Monsters have been to and lost two fantasy bowls).

Matt Rzyczycki - Captain Tripps: "You see me every freaking day directing traffic. How about something to drink you cheap ass!"

Steve Suder - PP Brains: "0-7. It's kind of hard to run a team when you have you finger up a raccoon's ass all day." (Suder's occupation is Animal Control Officer).

Mike Szydlowski - Polish Monarchs: "If you throw your pebble brain in a pond... Does it make a ripple??"

John Thiem - Masons: "Who??"

Storm Thomas - Gargoyles: "Little Head + Big Body = Brontosaurus"

Vince said he will always talk trash during fantasy football season, even if his team drops from contention. The secret to winning the smack talking wars is simple, according to the owner who is clearly leading the pack this year.

"Everyone is either too pussy like DJ or too Mr. Intellectual like Toiletbound II and the Donikers," Vince said. "Smack is supposed to crude and to the point. You should not need a freaking dictionary to get through a quote. Most of all, it should be funny. But I guess, it's hard to run smack with the SMACK-DADDY!!"

Editor's Note: All owners who would like to respond to Vince's comments should e-mail me at KPAVELICH@neo.rr.com  I figure the line will be long...